waking up to be a new man

Today i woke up finally not tearing for her. Although I do miss her still but i guess i let it all out yesterday. I don't want a life time with you now. i just want a moment yes, I'm moving on dear friends, i know she changed, people change and sometime shit happens. Anw nami and rash had been the biggest help but yeah, people close to me made me realise she does not change me for the better but she's just destroying my life, i am the one who made the changes for the better myself. i thought she was the one i could be with, sing songs till late night,cuddling and whispering in each others ears under the shinning star. But i guess i was deceived by love, yeah DECEIVED. i was being an asshole towards my closest friends ignored them when I'm with her, but still they are here for me when i got no where to turn to. So i hope her new guy, when ever or who ever it is, would have a HUGE amount of patient, alot of time and low jealousy level. I'm sorry to say to you, IF, you can't find another guy which will cook when you are haungry and want to eat the particular food for you, run to buy you food when you are sick, feed you when u can't wake up, listen and be your punching bag when ever your angry at something, cry together with you when your upset and miss your papa. I'm just hurt when you say I'm the same as ur abah( ur real dad). Which guy in the your life that you know would even let you maki his parents, MOTHER, but just take a deep breath and look you in the eyes. Which guy would even treat you they way i did when we'er not even married or tied any knot. That's where you guys go wrong, maybe your abah was nice to your mum at times when they were together. but was he nice like the way i am? who teach you to cook the soup that even your siblings like it. who teach you the way to cook pasta. who teach you what to do when you angry with your mum and sister just be sarcastic. Did your abah gave that love to your mum? Now i realise what I'm fooling around with and I'm making it clear although i mention all this. i don't want you back. FOR NOW, but if we are fated to be with each other, I won't turn out to be like ur abah, i'll be the one that you'll come home early to share your problems and happiest of the day and to share tears and laughter for a life story of bitter and sweetness.